A rock solid, hope

My hope is built on nothing else,but Jesus my saviour, an old school hymn that patches up shaky faith- flashes in my thought as I pen down this.Its time for burial,the grave is dug,the wreath is placed,the coffin is closed and even the psalm is read,despite all Jesus says, all after 3 whole dead days " come alive you lazarus".My family is wrecked,scorned by all nail and flesh,the text at its appendix and the service at its benediction,but my faith in my resurrecting saviour says,"there is hope in christ".I have done blunders,sin so abominal but the blood of christ assures me just one warning call,"hey return back".My heavenly father can't behold my filth,but his beckoning cry is heard from deep ,saying my lil' one," i died for you".I can't resist those loving words, i can't breathe void him.Jesus- iam scared ,shame and fear stand as tidal waves roaring up high, they distrupt my courage.My yeild up to mundane mirth have grown massive to trample my confidence,iam insecure,trembling and broken.Wont your helping hand reach me ,pamper my delusions and sail me to desired havens of your choice?. I fail,I fail and again fail but my hope in christ whispers don't give up,there is hope just stand steadfast,you'll succeed thru' your hope in christ.